Nurse to Grief Coach: Helping others rewrite life after loss

My Story…

After over a decade working in the NHS as a nurse in early pregnancy and women’s health, I reached a point where something had to change. My husband had accepted a job in Germany, and with Brexit, COVID, and a two-year-old to care for, our family needed to be together. This was when I first experienced the power of coaching—a coach helped me reassess my priorities, recognise what was and wasn’t working, and figure out how to reshape my life to align with my family’s needs.

In May 2021, I drove from Northumberland, England, to Leipzig, Germany, with my son, to reunite with my husband and start a new chapter. My initial plan was to pursue a PhD, combining my interest in research with my passion and commitment to supporting women and families after pregnancy loss. However, a series of events including an injury to my writing hand, my son’s repeated illnesses and surgery, a miscarriage and another pregnancy, as well as the demands of navigating life in another language, made it clear that the PhD was no longer serving me. I needed to return to working directly with people.

Over the next year, I worked with another coach who helped me find clarity and confidence in my decision to step away from my PhD. During this time, I also started to see the possibility of becoming a coach myself. I had firsthand experience of its benefits, and I could clearly envision how coaching could provide vital support for individuals and couples navigating infertility, pregnancy, and loss, long after they had left the hospital.

 Grief and loss in all their forms

By 2023, my family was preparing to move to Portugal, but visa restrictions meant I had to return to the UK with our now two children, while my husband moved ahead. I resumed clinical nursing and began seriously exploring professional coaching training. After extensive research, late-night conversations, and endless spreadsheets, I enrolled in The Coaching Academy’s Diploma in Life Coaching. From the moment I received my training materials, I knew I had made the right decision.

I have always been passionate about women’s health, and given the ongoing challenges surrounding fertility, pregnancy loss, and health inequalities, I knew coaching could make a difference in this space. And so, Lost Words Coaching & Mentoring was born—a practice dedicated to helping individuals and couples find strength, clarity, and peace after loss becomes part of their story.

While I set up my practice based on my clinical and personal experience of pregnancy loss, I soon recognised how broad the experience of grief and loss truly is. We so often associate grief and loss with death, but in reality, it comes in so many forms and can appear when we least expect it: from relationship breakdowns, family conflicts, and long-term illness of a loved one, to the loss of identity following major life changes such as parenthood, relocation, or job loss. As people began approaching me for support in these areas, it became clear that my coaching had the potential to help individuals through all kinds of loss.

The importance of telling it your way

Two recurring themes in my coaching conversations are communication and self-care.  Grief affects people differently, and when significant loss occurs, individuals often process it in ways that don’t align with their closest friends and family. This can lead to misunderstandings, breakdowns in communication, and feelings of isolation. That’s why I offer both individual and couples coaching, to help people find the words to describe their experience, help them reconnect with themselves and their loved ones, taking time to understand each other’s grief, and rebuild their relationship as a team.

Another challenge is the overwhelming pressure to "do" rather than "be." There are often many different voices around grief, imposing expectations on how we should grieve (or not), and many people feel guilty for taking time to care for themselves—especially after child loss. They throw themselves into work, parenting, and other life responsibilities, often neglecting their own healing. Coaching helps individuals step back, reassess priorities, and recognise that self-care is not selfish—it’s essential. Looking after yourself ultimately benefits those around you and finding ways to do this can be life changing.

Through coaching I support my clients to find their own words to tell their story, to change the narrative so it aligns with their values, needs, and beliefs. Someone said to me throughout my training that “humans are predictably different” and this is so true, especially when it comes to grief processing and management: your story of loss is yours alone, and it’s vital that you can tell it your way. 

The future of Lost Words Coaching & Mentoring

Lost Words Coaching & Mentoring will continue as long as people experience loss, and my goal is to expand my work to make coaching more accessible for those in need, particularly through partnerships with charities and organisations supporting families after loss.

A key area I am passionate about is improving language services for families experiencing pregnancy loss in the UK when English is not their first language. The lack of adequate language support can significantly impact how individuals process their grief and understand their experience. This is an issue I intend to advocate for and work towards improving.

Similarly, it is often assumed that pregnancy loss happens only to those who are actively trying to conceive...... It is vital that young people, whether this be through school, healthcare providers, or youth groups, have access to information on the symptoms of baby loss and where to seek help, not just how to avoid pregnancy in the first place. Empowering professionals working with young people to confidently support and signpost to pregnancy-related services is an equally important and fundamental step in ensuring equal access to services.  

The impact of coaching

Coaching has had a huge impact on my life, and it continues to transform the lives of those I work with. My background as a nurse has always been rooted in caring for people, and now, through coaching, I combine my expertise in healthcare, language teaching, and coaching to support individuals and families through some of life’s most difficult moments, helping them create their own narrative, gain clarity, and take steps towards a positive future.  Lost Words Coaching & Mentoring is not just about grief - it’s about strength, empowerment, and finding a way forward when life takes an unexpected turn.   

Thank you Katherine for sharing your encouraging coaching journey with us.