From Resolutions to Results: How to Build Habits That Last All Year

Did you do Dry January? Or did you set yourself another change goal at the beginning of 2025? In January we often feel it’s a good time to set ourselves some intentions around behaviour change, perhaps we feel, after the often-indulgent Christmas period, that we want to change some habits to be more mindful of our wellbeing. Coming into February and the rest of the year, if we want to make these changes viable and sustainable for the long term, how can we help ourselves?

 Here are my top tips to help you:

• The rule of three: If you did do Dry Jan, or have ever done the Couch 2 5K challenge, or been learning a language on an App, you might notice there are key elements in these programs. 

1. Progress Tracking: each day you get to see how well you’re doing this helps motivate us as we can see the improvement. 
2. Social Incentive, there is often a community aspect, or you’re encouraged to buddy up, this is because we as humans care what others think, we often want to match (or beat our peers), again this helps us to keep going if have ever got into the habit of doing online puzzles like Wordle, you know how this works! 
3. Immediate Reward: often these Apps will have badges or celebratory sounds when you complete your task (Or brains are wired to value more what happens now than the long-term intangible aspects to change, so these help us to keep on track)  You can learn more about this in Tali Sharot’s Ted Talk. So, what might this look like in the behaviour change you would like to continue? How can you monitor progress, get involved with a group and make sure you reward those daily actions?

• Longevity and consistency: On average it takes around 66 days to fully adopt a new habit. The more you do it and stay consistent, the more your brain will reprogram from the conscious effort to change, to an unconscious habit. 
• Are you relying on willpower? Often when we want to change behaviour, it’s due to the negative impacts that behaviour has had. This is a move away from goal, based on fear of repeating or continuing that behaviour. We can use will power to push that behaviour away. However, we know that willpower is like a muscle, it gets fatigued, and the more things we are pushing away the harder it becomes to maintain. So, what if you had a mindset shift around your motivation – rather focusing on what you are not doing, why not focus on what you want instead? A move towards goal. This is where an experienced coach can help, to create the picture of where you want to get to. This behaviour change then becomes part of something bigger and more meaningful for you. 
• It's not about what you do, it’s about who you want to be: What we understand from behavioural science is that although the left side of our brain, that helps us process, create strategy and works with logic is important in shaping how we act it doesn’t drive behaviour change. We can know that smoking is bad for us, or getting up early will help us manage our day and reduce stress, however what if we feel like a smoker, it’s part of our personality? Or we have never been an early bird? Our emotional right size brain is the most powerful driver in change, that’s why we often hear people talk of encouraging lifestyle change as opposed to behavioural change. When we can connect the changes to the person we want to be, that is where the gold lies. Can you tell yourself “I am a runner” “I am alcohol-free” “I am an early bird” “I am someone who takes care of my health” on a regular basis. This will help you enormously not just to do, but to become the change. 
• It's ok if your change cycle isn’t linear, keep going, learn from what happened and carry on: If we refer to Prochaska & DiClemente’s model (1983) there are different stages we go through in the change process. Although it is not a given that we will go back to old ways (Relapse/reoccurrence), it does happen. What this does is give us the opportunity to learn. Perhaps we reenter the cycle with more preparation. Or we take action with more conviction. What we are aiming for is maintenance.   
• How are your stress levels? It could be argued that behaviour change is better suited to the Spring, at the moment certainly in the northern hemisphere we are in Winter, a time for introspection and rest. Perhaps you don’t have the energy right now? How many things have you said you’d do? Is that a SMART goal for you? What is the one thing that would make the biggest difference, perhaps start there? If you’re feeling overwhelmed and unmotivated, perhaps the goals are too big? Or perhaps they are based on external “shoulds” that don’t really suit your individual capacity right now? It’s really key to make changes that we know in our gut can happen. If it’s feeling too hard, what support and help can get on board? In order for us to maintain change for the long term, managing stress will be key. 
• How do you view the changes you have made? Do you see this as a challenge to finish or a continued journey of development? This really helped me in my own change cycle. I stopped drinking alcohol for a year, and although I had seen numerous benefits (less anxiety, better patience, more money, better sleep to name a few) 5 days after that year date, I decided to drink again. It took me a long time to understand why, it was reading an article by Gretchen Rubin which helped me understand. I had subconsciously fixed a year in my head as my goal. I had no plan after that, therefore despite the positive changes, I returned back to my previous behaviour. In Gretchen’s article based on her The Four Tendencies book, she explained that some people respond better to milestones than goals or fixed challenges. That is certainly the case for me. I like to count the days, it ties into progress tracking which motivates me, however now, I don’t attach to a specific date. In August it will be 8 years , I see it as a touchstone, I acknowledge it, but I am fixed on further on down the road. I know what 8 feels like… I wonder what 9 will be like ect… 
• Finally, what information are you surrounding yourself with? Have you naysayers telling you, you can’t or cheerleaders supporting you that you can? Do you surround yourself with positive role-models living the change you want on social media? It’s important to be mindful, what we surround ourselves with, especially if we have low self-esteem, as comparison can be the thief of joy, but if you can find a good balance of knowledge and inspiration in the area of change you want for yourself, this will help foster hope, which in turns fosters motivation. 

In conclusion, with changing your behaviour it’s about curating your own tool kit which motivates you. I hope these ideas have helped you. Most importantly, keeping going, if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again!

If you would like to hear more from Mandy, she will be leading our Introduction to Trauma Awareness and Coaching training event, part of our Continuing Professional Development (CPD) for Coaches Programme, you can find out more and book your placevia our coach training events calendar.

About Author:

Mandy Manners is a highly respected coach, Coaching Academy expert trainer and mentor.  She is an award winning trauma-informed ICF accredited certified professional life and recovery coach, an Ambassador for Alcohol Change, an author, speaker and a ‘She Recovers®’ designated coach. She specialises in stress resilience, behavioral change and wellbeing coaching. She is also an associate trainer and coach for Real Clear Coaching who work with socially minded organisations.