How to help your clients take dynamic action with inner calm

Stress results from our unmet expectations of ourselves, others, or situations. It can lead us to inaction, or actions taken based on other people’s opinions and expectations of us.  When stressed, it can seem impossible to take action, let alone take dynamic action! So how do we act with energy and purpose? How do we keep ourselves motivated and energised and at the same time act with peace and calm? The answer lies in our core, in our ‘self’.

From birth, we are conditioned to fit definitions and identities of our family, society and expectations from us. We thus take on other’s expectations, which feel like our own, and we work so hard on trying to meet them. This puts immense pressure on us, leading to stress, inaction, stagnation and worse, taking unaligned actions going down the wrong trajectory!

While it is almost impossible to stop this process of disconnection from the core due to societal conditioning, we must work on re-establishing it.  When working with a client who has recognised their stress, you can, as a coach, weave the following three steps into your sessions. These steps will help them understand the disconnect and work to re-establish it, adapting to your coaching style and the client's personality:

1: Get clear on the true identity of your ‘self'

The secret to calmly taking dynamic action is to first know your ‘self’. One way to do this is to get clear on your values and beliefs. As a part of your Life Coaching Diploma training programme with The Coaching Academy, you work on your values and beliefs, which form a part of your identity. These tell you what you stand for, what you hold important and what you don’t, what holds you back and what you will never allow (ie what you see as injustice in this world). They tell you who you are, why you do things the way you do, and why you avoid doing them.

When you live under the illusion of false or limiting beliefs and what is sometimes the programming since birth, you may expect from yourself that which is not possible.  Realising this helps you to break free from unrealistic expectations and connect to your true identity.   It is important to also believe that all the answers to your challenges and aspirations lie within you.  By believing this it shifts your focus from external validation to internal wisdom and helps develop trust in your own ‘self’ rather than seeking the answers outside.  Trusting yourself helps you develop an immovable self-belief, giving you the courage to act with certainty.  A core principle of coaching is that individuals hold the answers and solutions to achieving their goals within themselves. As a coach, you can support them in unlocking this potential.

2: Connect to the true identity of your ‘self’

Connecting to your true identity is essential for taking dynamic action with inner calm. Begin by understanding and embracing who you truly are. This leads to genuine satisfaction and fulfilment.

Often, external successes feel hollow if we are disconnected from our true selves. You might achieve recognition yet still feel unfulfilled. This sense of unfulfillment stems from not being in touch with your core self.

True success is about the internal feeling of accomplishment. By nurturing your connection to your true self, you cultivate inner success, which brings stability, inner strength, and peace. This, in turn, empowers you to take dynamic action with a calm and centred mind.

Helping your coaching clients connect with their true identity allows them to find real success within themselves. This inner success enables them to take meaningful, dynamic actions confidently and calmly, leading to a more fulfilling life.  

3: Spend time contemplating the true identity of your ‘self’           

Spending time contemplating (ie thoughtful or long consideration of) the true identity of your ‘self’, enables you start to re-connect to your core, your own decision making and where the ability to act with calm lies.  With this connection, taking dynamic action with calmness and confidence, becomes easier. With every decision, calm starts to feel like your default mode. Call it reflection, meditation or contemplation, you must make time for it daily. 

Early morning hours work wonders for this, as the late Wayne Dyer would say:  ‘"Early morning hours have secrets to tell you!". As you go about your day, stay in the awareness of what you read or reflect on that morning. Bring those thoughts with you and notice what you notice! Live every moment, in that awareness. With practice, it will become your default mode and taking dynamic action, from this calm state of being, your natural state of doing.

To conclude, remind your clients that it is completely healthy to have expectations of themselves. In fact, it is vital to set goals and expect themselves to meet them, to grow and progress.  However, they first need to re-connect to their core true ‘self’, thus making dynamic action with calm so much easier, doable, and even enjoyable!

Ready to transform lives and embark on a rewarding career as a life coach?  

Join our free Introduction to Life Coaching webinar to discover the essential skills and insights you need to get started. Don’t miss this opportunity to learn from experienced coaches and explore how you can make a positive impact.  Choose from available dates today and take the first step towards your new journey!

About Author:

Deepti Goyal is a Stress Riddance Specialist & Coach who helps British Asian Women meet their own expectations of work’s life balance.  In today’s world most of us feel a disconnect and this at the core makes us feel uneasy, restless and not-at-peace.  I help you re-establish this connection, so that you can find the peaceful balance you are looking for.