Coaching your way to confidence

As human beings we will often judge others by what we see on the outside, but then judge ourselves by what we feel on the inside. But we don’t know what anyone else is thinking or the journey they have taken to get to that point of confidence. And this is where confidence is misleading – just because a person is confident at parties, it doesn’t mean they are confident in all areas of their life.

People often say that they are not confident enough to try something new, such as owning their own business, making a podcast, or becoming a life coach. They believe that they must be confident in all areas of their life before embarking on this journey. What they don’t realise is that it is through experiencing things outside our comfort zone that we gain confidence. Because confidence isn’t an innate character trait that we either have or don’t have. Instead, it’s better to think of confidence as a skill that can nurtured. 

So how do we nurture our own confidence?

1. Start with a reality check and acknowledge the areas that we are confident in. It might be that we can whip up a delicious meal for six people at the drop of a hat, create a flawless excel spreadsheet when asked or act as a mediator between friends. Once we know that we are confident in certain areas, rather than completely lacking in confidence, we can then begin reframing our beliefs about our ability to be confident. We might even decide that if we are confident in three areas of life, what is stopping us from making it a fourth of a fifth?    
2. Take small steps. When we set ourselves a goal that is completely outside of our comfort zone, such as making a speech or going to a party by ourselves, we sometimes struggle to see it as achievable because we are fixated on the moment we step onto the stage or enter a room full of new people. If it feels too enormous to tackle, then we might procrastinate or even run away from it. However, if we break those tasks down into small attainable steps, it will become a smoother journey where we prepare, practise, anticipate obstacles, and work out strategies to step around them.     
3. Surround yourself with people who are encouraging and supportive. If we hear regular, positive feedback then it will eventually begin to sink in. Accept people’s praise and recognition and in return highlight where you think they are succeeding themselves. If you don’t have this in your life at the moment, try to expand your social circle or peer group. At The Coaching Academy, we have been training coaches for over twenty years and some of the coaching networks established in the early years are still going strong today. 

We all have the ability to be confident inside of us, we just have to treat it as another muscle that we must practise using, rather than a barrier between us and our goals. 

To learn more about what really makes a great coach, you can join us at one of our free Introduction to Life Coaching  webinars. They are interactive, informative and designed to help you understand if training to be a life, executive, business or education coach is for you. 

We look forward to meeting you!