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The power of metaphors in life coaching: unlocking hidden meanings and potential

The Coaching Academy Blog

Posted: February 2023

If you are a life coach or a coach in training, this article by The Coaching Academy’s very own Course Advisor and Life Coach, Françoise Olivier, will give you insight into the power of metaphors in life coaching, along with providing some key ideas on how to listen to your client’s language and play around with metaphors.

Some of my most powerful coaching sessions have involved metaphor work. Using metaphors in coaching can be an enlightening tool, offering new perspectives and unlocking hidden potential in individuals seeking to make positive changes in their lives.   

What is a metaphor? 

A metaphor (from the Latin, metaphora) takes an object or action and compares it to something blindingly familiar but completely unrelated.

Here are some examples of metaphors:

  • Light at the end of the tunnel
  • I got cold feet
  • He is a fish out of water
  • Time is money

As coaches, we hope a client’s shift in perspective may prompt growth and insight. We all talk in stories and repeat a lot of the same information. It’s not until a Life Coach asks those powerful coaching questions (hopefully!) that a client can think beyond the usual script. Metaphor work can be a gateway into this new thinking. 

This quote by Marilee Goldberg from ‘The Art of the Question’ sums things up perfectly:

 “A paradigm shift occurs when a question is asked inside the current paradigm that can only be answered from outside it.”

As with introducing any new coaching techniques, it’s best practice to explain to the client that you want to explore the metaphors they use before beginning. It will take a client who is open to digging a little deeper and exploring things on a visual level. More analytical thinkers exploring metaphors in coaching might delve beyond what is consciously known. It will be a new experience for the client at first, but metaphor work can be fun, and allow some creativity in sessions.  

So, how does using metaphors in life coaching work?

To answer this, think about whether you have ever stopped and listened to your own use of language. How often do you use metaphors? Do you ever ask yourself, “what does that metaphor mean to me?”

For example, if someone is feeling tangled in a situation and they cannot see a way forward, pulling apart a metaphor may simplify the situation. They may say, “I feel trapped and can’t see a way out.” You could explore the metaphor by asking the following questions:  

  • “What if we were to explore that. What does it look like where you are trapped?”
  • “Can you describe if the thing trapping you is solid, small, thin, rigid?”
  • Or even simply saying, “Describe the trap.”

What comes next could give insight into what might need to happen to loosen the grip. If the trap is like a spider’s web, this could be easier to break free of than something like a metal cage.  We should be conscious of our descriptions when sharing them with our clients. Our visual representation of what they are explaining may not match their experiences. 

Our training teaches us to listen out for our client’s language. If we notice certain patterns or repeated words/phrases, it would be good practice to reflect that back. Reflecting our clients’ language back to them will not only make them feel heard but it will give them insights they may never have had the time to discover.

Using Clean Language

Another option we have when exploring metaphors is using Clean Language. Clean Language was developed by psychotherapist, David Grove, in the 1980s. Grove recognised that many practitioners subtly influenced their clients during their sessions and noticed that this was particularly true when both were using metaphors.

There are nine basic Clean Language questions that you can use to ensure you don’t influence the client but help to gain a better understanding of their metaphor: 

  1. And is there anything else about . . .?
  2. And what kind of . . . is that . . .?
  3. And where is . . .?
  4. And whereabouts?
  5. And what happens next?
  6. And then what happens?
  7. And what happens just before. . .?
  8. And where could . . . come from?
  9. And that's . . . like what?

As you can see, the questions are simple and free of any leading language or suggestions from you. If you decide to use Clean Language, my advice would be to explain it to your client first. Otherwise, it might feel clunky or strange. Other points to consider to help the client to relax into things, they may not want to break the flow by taking notes. Or you may have a client who prefers drawing their descriptions.  

Exploring metaphors in life coaching takes some practice, the best way to use them in your coaching sessions is to become more aware of them in general conversations.  Not only did it have a positive impact on my clients, but it also transformed my confidence. So much so that I’m writing about it!       

I would love to hear from you over on social media, if you'd like to share your experiences with metaphor work.

 

If you would you like to have a coaching business you can run from the comfort of your own home, or add coaching skills to your existing role, then do join us on our Introduction to Life Coaching webinar.

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