When I first went into business I suffered hugely with Imposter Syndrome. I had gone into teaching straight out of university and stayed for 18 years. I knew how to engage teenagers and a lot about Shakespeare and poetry- but, I felt, that was about it!
I loved coaching but I didn’t yet know I was good at it and I knew absolutely nothing about business…
I started to apply myself to learning the fundamentals of starting a business, but I quickly learned that what was as important, if not more important, was working on my mindset. I had to believe it before I could achieve it.
When we don’t focus on building a resilient mindset we are much more likely to self-sabotage, procrastinate or miss the opportunities in front of us.
Mindset Matters
I got to work on my mindset: I read every personal development book going; I created a compelling vision of where I wanted to be in five years’ time and kept replaying that vision to myself. I chose empowering affirmations and wrote them in a notebook every morning; I created my very first vision board and wrote the word ‘JOY’ at the centre and this reminded me to keep the joy, in spite of the challenges.
Community Matters
Jim Rohn was one of my early mentors. My dad bought his audio tape series ‘The Art of Exceptional Living’ and played them in the car. We learned many valuable lessons from Jim Rohn, one being:
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
The problem was that when I started my coaching career, I hadn’t yet found other people who had done what I wanted to do. The people around me, and especially those close to me, resisted my career change. Everyone knew me as a teacher. They knew I loved teaching and couldn’t fathom why on earth I would leave a secure career for the uncertainty of the entrepreneurial world.
Most came around in the end, but I lost some friends along the way.
While I love and value my family and friends who don’t know anything about the coaching world, I realised I needed to make some new friends who were on the same journey. I made amazing connections during my coach training, set up a coaching community in my local area and started to connect with other entrepreneurs. These connections became invaluable as these were the people who got it, who would show up and support me and ask me for support when they needed it.
Success Leaves Clues
One important learning was to learn from the successes and failures of others who were further ahead of me. This meant absorbing all I could from the people I didn’t know personally (yes Jim Rohn, Marie Forleo, Brene Brown and most recently Steven Bartlett…).
I built connections with people further ahead and I met my now business partner Rebecca Daniel on a coaching course. Rebecca, also an ex-English teacher, had left teaching just a few months ahead of me. The first time we met I grilled her about her experiences. What I really wanted to know was ‘Is it actually possible to make a living as a coach?’ Rebecca and I became friends, accountability buddies and subsequently business partners. For me, forming connections with others at the same stage, and further ahead was vital.
Avoid The Comparison Trap!
We have evolved as part of a tribe and our greatest fear is rejection from that tribe. So the fear-based part of our brains are wired to make negative comparisons to others. That narrative runs through our brains: “They are more attractive/ more articulate/ more successful than me….” Or “It’s ok for them because….”. The comparison trap is particularly dangerous in the online world where the ‘narrative’ is so often about making 6 figures overnight.
I still fall into the comparison trap but now when I see this happening I do the following:
Take a look back 6 months or one year or three years ago. What have you learned? What are you doing differently now?
Be Authentic
We all have a unique value and contribution. When I started out I didn’t believe I had what I needed as a business owner. But I now appreciate that so many skills I took for granted in teaching are invaluable in this field (the ability to communicate clearly, build relationships, deliver content, plan, time management, creativity)
And the more I became comfortable with being authentic the more I attract people I love to work with (lots of clients from education and NHS but also so many clients who resonate for less obvious reasons: like me they have 3 children, Irish Catholic heritage etc. These synchronicities never fail to surprise me but they come as a result of me being authentic and not trying to be someone I’m not.
Keep Showing Up
My mantra to myself is ‘Keep showing up’- when I’m lacking in confidence or I’m just not feeling it! We don’t have to be perfect but we do need to be consistent. Years ago I heard a speech that resonated with me from an amazing leader in education who reminded us that “Consistently good is outstanding practice”. We don’t have to be perfect but we do have to show up and do the best we can.
For me, mindset work is knowing that there are days when there are highs and lows and everything in between. That’s ok: acknowledge how you feel; choose your response and whatever you do- keep showing up for yourself and for the people who need you!
Your Ideal Client
When we are in a coaching conversation, we are giving our energy. The more aligned we are with the person we are working with, the easier it will be to form a connection and to step into their shoes. When we start to listen to clients’ language we start to notice patterns and this in turn makes it easier to speak to our clients through marketing in a way that resonates with them.
Now I’d love to know…
From what I have said, what resonates with you? What will you take action on? What would you like to add to this conversation?
Sarah Bramall is a qualified Transformational Coach, Neuro-Linguistic Programming practitioner and accredited DISC Personality Profiling practitioner and is CPD certified in Confidence Coaching, Resilience Coaching and Transactional Analysis.
Sarah is a coach trainer for The Coaching Academy and a partner coach for Careering into Motherhood. Sarah specialises in supporting women in leadership, confidence and well-being. She works both with individuals and professionals in the corporate and public sector. She is also a co-founder of 'The Coaching Catalysts’, alongside Rebecca Daniel. They are both highly qualified and experienced ex-teachers, transformation coaches, neuro-linguistic programming and DISC personality profiling practitioners.
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