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Are You Holding Yourself Back?

The Coaching Academy Blog

Posted: March 2021

Our thoughts and internal dialogue can lead to stories that we carry with us throughout our whole life. Stories that don't inspire us to think big but rather keep us from reaching our true potential. So in this article, we're facing the most common phrases holding you back, head-on. Read on! #CourageouslyYou

The language we use to communicate with ourselves has incredible power and it is often the case that the words we use can be a reflection of both our internal and external experiences.

Learning to become aware of the impact your words have on your reality is the first step towards being able to change the way you speak to yourself when going after your dreams.

Below are six of the most common phrases that could be holding you back:

1. I don’t have enough money/time/knowledge etc.

What if, you did have all of the money, time and knowledge? What would your life look like? Instead of focusing your attention on what you don’t have, consider how you could have it. 

If you made time to work on your hobby could it build your confidence to turn it into a business? If you invested in the correct training or courses would that help to enhance your knowledge? How could you find ways to make more money to invest in doing the things that you love? 

Instead of allowing your thoughts to stop you with ‘I don’t have’ statements, consider directing your mind to ‘how could I’ questions. When you do so, you can feel more empowered and your mind is more able to direct you to a solution that moves you forwards instead of hitting a dead end.

2. It’s too hard

When you go after what you want, it won’t always be smooth sailing. There may be times where you encounter challenges along the way. 

Everything takes practice, maybe there were times you thought learning how to ride a bike, drive a car or learn a new language seemed difficult but after investing time into developing your skill, maybe you are now able to do these things effortlessly.

Staying focused on the bigger picture and knowing that every bump in the road is a stepping stone that is moving you one step closer to pushing through your limits can help you to stay motivated to keep going.

3. I’m scared

Experiencing moments of fear and self-doubt are common when going after what you want. When you move out of your comfort zone it is natural to feel nervous, but you shouldn’t allow your fear to paralyze you.

Fear doesn’t always mean STOP, sometimes it means keep going. 

Instead of saying ‘I’m afraid’ consider saying ‘I’m excited'. Start with smaller steps and move at a pace that you feel comfortable with and eventually you can build up your courage to go after bigger goals.

4. That’s just who I am

If you maintain a rigid way of looking at yourself and situations, you may limit yourself from creating a life that you love. The world around us is constantly evolving and if we don’t allow ourselves to be flexible to adapt, we hold ourselves back from growing. 

Keeping an open mind and being willing to explore the parts of ourselves and our lifestyles that aren’t in alignment with what we want and considering how we can change, helps us to open doorways to new ways of being, doing and achieving.

5. I’ve tried before and it didn’t work out

There is no failure, only feedback! 

If things haven’t worked the first time around it doesn’t mean that you are any worse off, in fact, you are one step closer because you may have learnt what doesn’t work. 

There have been countless success stories of people who didn’t get things right the first time around, Thomas Edison is one example of someone who didn’t give up, it took him 1,000 attempts before he was able to invent the light bulb and light up our world. 

Asking yourself what wisdom you attained from your failed experience and considering what you could do differently next time, are both ways that you can continue to move forwards.

6. I’m not ready

Often perfectionism is procrastination dressed in disguise. We may wait for a ‘perfect moment’ that never seems to arrive or tell ourselves that we need to do more before we even consider getting started. 

This mentality can keep us stuck and stop us from taking action. 

When you’re able to remind yourself that ‘you don’t need to get it perfect straight away, you just need to get it going’ you let go of the pressure you may put on yourself to make things perfect and you’re able to move into a space of exploring small action steps that you feel comfortable with to move things forward. With every action step that you take, you’re able to move your dreams out of your head and into your world.

When we become aware of the language we’re using when considering our ideas, it can quite literally be the breakthrough that unlocks our potential to move forwards.

If you think you might be holding yourself back and could do with some guidance, you may find it helpful to consult with one of our life coaches in the TCA community.

And if you wish to help others as a life coach, why not join the free Introduction to Life Coaching webinar? Learn more about coaching and the industry, discover tools that will help you move forward and find it if life coaching is for you! Choose from available dates here. 

Ready to embark on a journey of self-knowledge and self-discovery? Join the #CourageouslyYou challenge and start Spring with developing the Relationship with Yourself! Follow us on Instagram and make sure you share your wins by using the  #CourageouslyYou hashtag! 

Want to empower your clients to develop better relationships with themselves?

If you wish to learn more about Coaching your clients through the relationship they have with themself, the Relationship Niche Coaching Workshop might be for you. There’s still time to enrol, find out more here

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