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Mastery Series - Pam Lidford's 10 things to consider about values

The Coaching Academy Blog

Posted: November 2019

Values are what matter to us most; they underpin what's important and what we focus on. Our values exists, whether they are recognised or not. They drive our choices and decisions, encompassing our motivators and fears, ultimately helping us take action (or not take action).

As part of our Mastery Series, confidence coach and TCA Trainer, Pam Lidford, is sharing 10 things to consider when it comes to your values. 

10 things to consider about values:

1. Most people don’t appear to really know what their driving values are, they think they do but values are sneaky.

2. Values drive our unconscious choices.

3. Values are there to keep us safe, which means they don’t always let us have what we say we want.

4. Think of values as single words, like security, freedom, fun, caution.

5. Values motivate us to take action or not take action.

6. Our core values meet our unconscious needs rather than our conscious wants.

7. We have 'move towards' and 'move away from' values - some research suggests more of us are driven by what we don’t want rather than towards what we do want.

8. We have core values (subconscious) and idealistic values (conscious) driving our goals.

9. Our reticulator activated system (RAS) is a heat-seeking ‘missile’ which is on the lookout to satisfy our subconscious values.

10. Values can be altered or even changed by significant emotional events (SEE).

Values govern everything we do, and are a useful barometer for our behaviours and choices. However, some people find it difficult to express and acknowledge their core values. For many, this is because they have never given themselves space or time reflect upon them. 

If you are unsure of your core values, a good place to start is to ask yourself:

When do I feel most fulfilled?

What moment in my life has stayed with me? What about this has touch me the most?

Your answers to these questions can help elicit some of your core values. For example, you felt most fulfilled when you graduated from university, this might signal that you value knowledge.  

It’s important to give ourselves space to reflect upon our values, as when we’re out of synch with what we truly value, it’s difficult to create a life that is fulfilling. Alternatively, when we’re aware of what’s truly important to us we can start consciously living our life in-line with our core values.  

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