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4 NLP techniques to feel instantly happier

The Coaching Academy Blog

Posted: October 2018

Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP) is a powerful approach to communication and personal development that empowers people to have greater control over their emotional state. NLP fundamental skills and tools give you the ability to be at your best more often by effectively managing your thoughts and feelings.

Created by Richard Bandler and John Grinder in 1972, NLP is designed to positively affect the connection between neurological processes (neuro), language (linguistic) and behavioural patterns learned through experiences (programming). In doing so, NLP can be used to alter these connect to help you achieve specific goals and enhance your personal development.  

NLP techniques allow you to have real power over your mind, language and actions and help you transform your behaviour. These 4 NLP techniques will give you the ability to live a happier and more successful life:

 

1. Anchoring

Anchoring is the most well-known and widely used NLP technique. The purpose of anchoring is to associate a positive memory with a deliberate gesture. For example, a memory where you felt powerful can be empowering and a valuable resource. As through Anchoring you can use this memory and store it through your senses: either Visual, Auditory, Kinaesthetic, Olfactory and Gustatory. By making this association, your brain will be able to make the connection between this positive memory and a particular gesture. As such, you will be able to elicit a positive emotional response simply through your actions. In turn, you are able to activate this anchor any time you are feeling low or stressed and in doing so, you can return to a state of happiness.

 

2. Reframing

Next on the list of NLP techniques that can boost your happiness and overall success is reframing. This technique is all about perspective and it allows you to see the opportunities in hardship, opposed to dwelling on barriers or the negatives. For example, let’s imagine your relationship has recently ended. Initially and on the surface, this will feel awful, however, let’s try reframing it. You can do this by asking: what are the possible benefits of being single? One could be that you are now available to meet new people or are open to other potential relationships. Another is that you now have the freedom to do what you want to do on your own schedule. Furthermore, you can take notice of the valuable lessons you have learned from this relationship which will allow you to have increasingly fulfilling relationships in the future. All of these points are examples of how we can reframe a situation. In doing so we are able to reframe the meaning and experience of the hardship or situation. Reframing empowers you to change the focus from negative to positive.  

3. Meta-modeling

Meta-modelling is a great technique that will help you discover the hidden truth of your reality, by identifying limiting language you are using in your daily life. You can use meta-model by paying attention to these 3 main language patterns that can hold you back from happiness:

- Generalisations: “My boss never listens to me.”

- Mind Reading: “Karen didn’t say Hello to me today, she must be angry with me.”

- Deletions or choosing your language to confirm pre-existing beliefs: “People don’t find me attractive.”

Once you identify which category your language patterns belong to, then it is time to challenge them and the limiting beliefs that they contribute to. For example, if you hear yourself saying something like “people don’t find me attractive,” you can challenge this through the meta-model by questioning the statement. For example, you might ask yourself, “who are these people specifically?” and “how do you know that they think this?” The chances are that by questioning the language and limiting beliefs to be more specific you will prompt your brain to think more logically about the situation and, in turn, begin to understand that these are ingrained responses that can be altered. Meta-modelling can prompt you to challenge negative language and unhelpful beliefs, so you can live a happier and more successful life.  

4. Rapport Building  

The ability to easily build rapport with people around you is an impactful way to make a real difference both personally and professionally. NLP tools, such as mirroring is a simple, yet effective way to connect and communicate. This technique involves subtly mirroring another person’s body language, a tone of voice and language choices. However, the key is to do so with subtly. If, for example, you are talking with someone who is using a casual tone of voice, is sitting down and has an open stance, mirroring this person’s language and behaviour will keep the tone they have set. Whereas if you chose to address them formally, with your arms crossed and refuse to sit, but instead stand, the tone of your conversation will dramatically shift and in turn, this person will feel uncomfortable. While it might seem obvious, mirroring is meaningful and easy to implement the technique that can enhance your communication and enable you to create a positive impression.  

The art and psychology of NLP give you greater control over your ability to be at your best more often. It allows you to communicate more effectively and have greater control over your emotional state. In turn, you are able to feel, think and be happier every day. What are some techniques you use to feel happier? Tell us in the comments below.

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